CocaLola's Journal

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31 January 2020

My body just does not respond well to carbs. I ate a small portion for two days consecutively. (100g of rice on Wednesday / 1 slice toast on Thursday)
I also think that I overdid it with the fruit over the past 2-3 days, so that needs to be limited again for a few days; more to be consumed as a treat NOT A MEAL!

The scale has not moved since starting this little test. The great news about the scale not moving, meaning that when I start to maintain and I eat a small portion of carbs and eat the fruit I SO LOVE, I will maintain weight. (GREAT NEWS FOR THE FUTURE) But for now, I need TO LOSE THE WEIGHT, not maintain it.

For the next 3 days I am going in with as little carbs as possible (simple & complex carbs). Curious to see how my body will respond. I have been cutting simple carbs for most of the 4 weeks, but I want to see what will happen if I cut carbs completely from my diet.

Trying to find a middle ground here.

This morning I had a full on PROTEIN MEAL. HUGE MEAL, which will surely sustain me until tonight.

My birthday in 9 days and you can believe that I will be having a SLICE OF CHOCOLATE CAKE! (hehehehehe)

30 January 2020

HELP!!!

I know this is going to sound stupid to some people.

I really have an issue with eating :( My calories are quite low most days and days like today I just feel I ate way too much and should not expect to lose any weight if I consume that much food. That to the logical mind is ridiculous, because if you look at my food intake..... average 1000 a day if I am lucky (just in case my calculations are wrong, I am sure I wont exceed 1200cals a day; staying on the safe side.)

It is as if in my mind, in order to lose weight makes me believe that if I am not "starving" that I am not going to lose weight. It is VERY CLEAR as the weeks go on that I am cutting my calories more and more. On the flip side I KNOW that I have to eat and at this point in time, even though the food doesnt look like a lot to some, it is really a lot for me. I feel full. I dont feel starved. The meals I prepare are enjoyable. Reminding myself that I am creating new habits and not just trying to lose weight. I am trying to find a balance I know I can sustain in the future. But now the ugly voice rears its head telling me that I am eating way too much.

Am the only one with this issue?

30 January 2020

29 January 2020

Today was butter cream icing class again, which meant I had to be very mindful of not eating the icing (marshmallow flavour) while presenting class. Then AGAIN I did not even have an urge to eat a cupcake either. However, Saturday I have 2 sessions back to back in Butter cream icing and I WILL SUSTAIN! I have changed the way I "speak". I can have the cupcake. I can have the bread. I can have the chips. I can, but I CHOOSE NOT TO! I choose to have them as special treats.

I have changed my dialog from "I cannot eat that." to "I prefer not to eat that." Taking back control. I AM IN CONTROL! MY CRAVINGS DO NOT CONTROL ME!

I think I am settling into my new lifestyle quite well.

Next goal, to exercise at least twice a week. That habit is going to take some serious effort. Like I have mentioned before, I want to incorporate this into my life, not only as a weight loss benefit, but as a way of relieving stress.

The pedometer I ordered is, for the lack of an appropriate word, shit! What an absolute let down! (Next bright idea)

Another very important part to my success and that is the most neglected area of weight loss, MY EMOTIONAL WELL BEING!

After deciding to cut negative and toxic people from my life, I have really been much calmer (and happier). I speak my mind and if you dont like it, then you know where the door is. :) I just cannot deal with people who suck the life out of me anymore and I am too old to put up with it either.

If you do not contribute to my life and in any way contaminate my peace, I am sorry, I cannot allow that anymore. Dealing with the negative relationship I have with food, meant dealing with the negative relationships in my life. And I did. Dont be fooled, it is not easy. But nothing in life worthwhile is easy!

You are responsible for your own happiness and if that means letting go of something that serves no positive purpose in your life, then JUST DO IT, like Elsa in Frozen>> Let it Go!!

Love & Light my fellow loser.
💖

29 January 2020

Weight: Lost so far: Still to go: Diet followed:
99.7 kg 4.3 kg 20.7 kg Reasonably Well
   (21 comments) Losing 0.9 kg a Week


CocaLola's Weight History


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